Common Sense, the Key Ingredient to Family Law Success
Common Sense, the Key Ingredient to Family Law Success
If you are going through a marriage or relationship breakup, is there any measure which indicates whether you are likely to succeed or have the sort of dreadful, expensive family law experience that many people experience?
I believe there is. That measure is; are you prepared to bring “common sense” and the best version of yourself to the family law resolution process following a breakup?
It is not easy. People are under a great deal of pressure following a breakup. It is so easy to be motivated by negative emotions of anger, fear and resentment and be over-competitive. There is a tendency for the settlement process to be a continuation of the unpleasant bickering and conflict which marked the end of the relationship. Family and friends are often unhelpful in their advice and attitudes. People feeling stress and anxiety find it very hard to make sensible decisions. It is understandable to be motivated by a desire to win and get the better of your former partner and make they suffer for what they have done.
It is also important to recognise that there is an industry out there waiting to take advantage of you if you bring your negative emotions to the dispute resolution process. Most family lawyers try hard to help their clients effectively. But if the client wishes to take an aggressive and domineering approach, it is difficult not to be very supportive of this. That is after all how family lawyers make their living and establish their careers and reputations. Such court proceedings sometimes work and are sometimes are necessary for the benefit of clients and their children. But usually not and most people who begin court proceedings come to regret it. But they are wonderful for lawyers.
There are usually better ways to resolve family law problems of property and parenting. Often it can be done quickly, efficiently and inexpensively and that should be the starting point and aim. Sometimes more expensive processes such as Mediation are necessary. Occasionally it may be necessary to start court proceedings. But if so, it is to achieve a purpose and get out of there as quickly as possible.
The key to success is to use your common sense. Following a separation, you may face intense problems. But you resolve them in the same way you resolve other problems in your life. You do so calmly and sensibly and get good advice and assistance. Very little of positive nature comes out anger and aggression. Look to express these emotions in different ways other than in your family law process. Rather as I suggest, make an effort to bring your higher values of honesty, empathy and integrity to the family law separation process.
I have developed and settlement program called “Lawfully Uncoupling”. It is based on taking a common sense approach to resolving conflict by working cooperatively with clients to come to sensible fair decisions in the best interest of everyone, particularly the children. It does not mean being passive, or that you don’t pursue your fair legal entitlements and the best interests of your children. But I am convinced by my years of practice in the courts and elsewhere over the last 40 years, that the common sense approach I advocate is the way to get the best possible results and to help and empower clients to seek their own best solutions and bring about a successful separation and a bright and prosperous future.
If you are interested in discussing your situation, wherever you are in Australia or overseas, please give me a ring, email me, or make an appointment on my website
Andrew Corish, BA LLB, Accredited Specialist Family Lawyer
Ph 02 8075 0141 email: andrew@moderndivorcesolutions.com.au
